Acceptance 3.0

Okay so, it’s been a while. I was sick but now I’m better so ….

In certain forum Acceptance got actually good reviews so… here is the third part! Now I wanna ask something.

Since I tried to make this fic as real as possible, at first I didn’t intend to break the Atsuko-Onoe pair… but Should I break them up and pair her with Minami or…? What do you think? Let me know!! xD

So here is the third part, I didn’t review it or edit it. I don’t feel like it. Also I didn’t want that flashback to be like that but honestly I can’t think of anything else in the moment. I don’t want you to keep waiting so here is it!

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Ps: I promised you a smut! Wait for it! I will edit it and then post it. Probably, tomorrow!

~~~~~

-Why am I here again, Atsuko? – I asked

-I really want you to taste this meal I’m doing. – She smiled at me as she placed all the plates in front of me – I want your opinion. It’s the first time I’m doing all this, so…

-Right…

Let me tell you something, the sweets she cooks are always delicious, but, when she tries to cook a decent meal the taste is simple… Not good. I looked at the meals in front of me, they didn’t have a strange color or smell, but I was more worried about the taste.

She called me hours ago, asking me if I was free and if I was hungry. Honestly, I thought we would go to a restaurant or something to eat, I never expected for her to invite me to eat and that she would cook. But again, even if she tells me that she wants me to jump off of a cliff, I would never say no. And so, since I had that night and next morning free, I decided to accept.

Once I arrived at her apartment and she again gave me a bear-crushing hug, I finally noticed the characteristic smell of cooking. I told her that I never expected she would cook, and at this point I was sweating, and she simple giggled and told me that she wanted to try cooking once again because she wanted to give Onoe-san a present on his birthday.

The boyfriend was named again and here I am being the laboratory rat. But I can’t deny her anything, not to her. I wonder what would have been of us if I would have accepted her proposal after her graduation party. Would she be cooking for me now? Shaking my head I decided to stop thinking about that. I always believed that once you made a decision you have to live with the consequences, no matter how hard it is.

I looked at her; she was looking at me with a big smile and expectation. I gulped and grabbing the fork I bravely tasted the first plate.

It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would… Or so I believed that in the beginning. The salty taste of the meat and then the sourness, all combined with all the random ingredients exploded after a few seconds of having them on my mouth. I didn’t want to hurt Atsuko’s feelings and I wanted that boyfriend of hers to taste this, so I just simple swallowed it all.

-Is it okay? – Atsuko asked me.

-Its… its… not… so bad actually… – I was trying not to make any gesture, but it was really bad.

And she noticed.

-Are you sure? – She insisted.

I nodded, fearing that if opened my mouth I would throw up. She wasn’t so convinced and told me to eat it all so she can be sure that everything had the right flavor. That didn’t end too well…

-You should have told me that it was bad! – She reprehends me as she passed me a cup of tea.

-I just didn’t want to hurt your feelings – “And I wanted for that man to suffer this instead of me” I added in my head.

Well, I guess that what people say is true… Karma is a bitch… I was half sitting, half lying down on her couch, she was next to me.

-Still! – She pouted.

I caressed her cheek, slowly, with my right hand and I smiled.

-It’s not like I’m going to die – I giggled – One more dish and I would have though…

She blushed and then slapped my arm. I liked that side of hers. The always shy and insecure Atsuko; that side that I wanted to protect at all cost, that side that I wanted to make happy; even if she wasn’t mine.

-Just let me recover for a while and I will help you out in the kitchen, okay? – I smiled, still feeling my stomach sick.

-Could you stay here till tomorrow? – She then asked – It’s just that I want to give it to him tomorrow because I won’t be around on his birthday.

And how could I say no?

I couldn’t sleep; for some reason I don’t feel relaxed. Maybe it’s because Atsuko is sleeping besides me, as usual, maybe is because I keep thinking about her and that man. Don’t get me wrong, I love the fact that she can experiment other kinds of love, that she is living her life, but what about us? What we are? I feel confused.

After her fail cooking of earlier, she told me that she had to work. She arrived home late and went straight to bed, without even changing her clothes, she didn’t hug me, so I feel free. I walked to her kitchen and made me a tea. The sounds of some cars roaming the streets and the characteristic sounds of the night relaxed me a bit.

I didn’t know what to do. If I keep coming to her house, keep half living with her, I fear that I could do something that I will regret and I don’t want to lose her. She’s my best friend above anything else. But my heart is just not happy with just that title. Sitting in her living room, in front of the TV, I just drink the hot tea as I let it warm my body in this fresh night. Sighing, I close my eyes and my memories come back to me, especially that day, at her last performance in the theater, her graduation.

There she was, with that radiant and big smile. She was trying to hold back her tears, but we were crying, knowing that we won’t see her as often as we usually do, that she won’t be there on special days, in the theater, that she won’t be there with us at concerts. But we all knew that she will be there for us.

Backstage was a chaos, the younger girls crying and hugging her while everyone else just cried alone, waiting for a moment as Atsuko assured that we are gonna be okay again and again. It wasn’t a heartbreaking image; to me she was an amazing example of braveness. And even though she said that she would be okay, I knew she was feeling scared. Soon enough she will be alone.

We changed our clothes and went out, to celebrate her graduation and her future success. I couldn’t see her; I was feeling worse than I thought. Nevertheless, I laughed and played along with all our friends. Mariko as always teasing and joking around, Yuko being Yuko and Kojiharu trying to control her; Miichan, however, was still crying while Atsuko spoke with her. For some reason I felt bad, I felt that the air in this private salon was heavy and I just needed to get out of there.

The rooftop had a good sight of this part of Tokyo. The bright lights and the busy people on the street, going home or to some kind of party; the workers that went out with their coworkers and the young people going to clubs and being young and stupid; and me, at my 20’s I wanted to be free, young and stupid.

I sigh; it’s so not like me to think like this but Atsuko’s graduation made me think about that freedom we get from this group. We are free to certain extent, but we have rules, and me, who’s at the very top I can’t just think like this. Though I would be glad to just do what the other girls do at this age. Young and stupid, for some reason it sounded great.

-Why are you here alone? – Her voice startled me and I jumped for a bit before turning back at her.

And there she was, still with that big and radiant smile, but with sadness in her eyes. What can I say to her? That I wish, even if it’s just for a second, to graduate too and follow her? I couldn’t say that, I needed to be strong. Feelings are just so hard to keep.

-I just needed some air – I laughed nervously – I think I drank a bit more than I should.

She raised an eyebrow, she knew me well.

-If you were drunk, you would be sleeping by now.

Well, that excuse will not work. I only had to be honest with her.

-I just… – she came closer to me – I just feel lonely… You’ll be gone soon and I…

She hugged me suddenly, hiding her face on my neck, and I could notice that she started crying.

-I will miss you too… – She whispered near my ear, making me shiver.

I hugged her back, tightly, trying to always remember how well we matched together; trying to always remember how warm her hugs are; and to remember that we won’t be away for too long.

-Live with me – She whispered suddenly.

I tensed right away. I knew what she was trying to say, I knew that she loved me; she already confessed it. I knew that I loved her too. But from knowing to actually acting as we were a couple, I just couldn’t. She noticed my change and pulled away, to face me.

-We can’t Atsuko… – I said softly.

-We already did – she said with a certain disappointment in her voice – What do you call to all these years and months together? Don’t tell me you don’t feel the same…

-I…

-Why Minami? Why is so difficult to agree? – She used that low voice that I hated.

-The love-ban rule… – I whispered.

-That’s stupid you know?! – She laughed bitterly – Either way, I’m free from that stupid rule now.

-But I don’t and I have to put an example and-

-Oh, come on! Every one of the members thinks we are together already! Don’t you see it?! You are the only one that it’s in denial.

Young and stupid. I wanted to be young and stupid and yet, here the captain in me totally didn’t allow me to just say “yes, let’s live together”

-I love you, Minami. Don’t you love me? – She whispered.

I gulped. Accepting that I loved her was like accepting the fact that I wanted to live with her and for some reason the words got stuck on my throat and instead other words were said.

-You don’t know that for sure – I said in a really low voice – You don’t know if you really love me. We’ve been together for a long time; this could be only confusion on your part…

-Don’t say that… I know I love you-

-How do you know? You don’t know anything else! Have you loved someone else? – I looked at her trying to put the serious face I always used with the members. I never used that face with her.

She looked at me for a few seconds and then she smiled.

-You’re right… I don’t know… – She cleaned the trail of tears from her cheeks and then smiled. – Just don’t regret it later okay?

I jumped when I felt a pair of arms around my shoulders.

-What are you doing here? – Atsuko asked with a very sleepy voice

-I’m sorry, I just couldn’t sleep… Why don’t you go back to bed? I’ll just stay here for a while and then I’ll go back…

She yawned and walked in front of me; she then sat on me and hugged me again.

-I can’t sleep without my pillow, remember? – She whispered and hugged me tighter.

Of course, this koala needed something or someone to hug every time she slept. I sighed again.

-Atsuko, let’s just go back to bed then… – No response and I frowned- Atsuko…?

I blinked. Great… She was sound asleep and not even an earthquake will wake her up… I wrapped my arms around her and tried to make myself comfortable in my current position. I sighed one last time and I let her characteristic strawberry scent fill my nose.

The next day I woke up feeling better and numb again, her hold around my waist was really strong. Opening my eyes, slowly as the sun made its way through the window of her living, I noticed, or more like the lack of feeling from my legs, made me realize that more than half of my body was still asleep. I looked at the koala I had still around my body and I smiled.

Her beauty was beyond the normal standards. Even when she said that she wasn’t cute and pretty, she was. Her bed hair and her natural look were even prettier. I wanted to wake up like this every day. I kissed her forehead and she then, lazily, opened her eyes. She looked at me, still asleep, and smiled; I smiled back.

-Good morning – I softly said.

-Good mor… – she yawned – ning

She stretched her whole body and deliberately slapped me.

-Oi!

She giggled and then placed a kiss on my cheek before getting up and walking towards the bathroom. She’s playing with me, I know. She likes it, playing with my feelings and having me in the palm of her hand. I am not complaining though.

After getting up, I went towards her kitchen. I wanted to prepare breakfast to her. Pancakes and fruit with orange juice to her and coffee to me; Atsuko never liked drinking coffee, saying that the flavor wasn’t made to her taste buds. I was so immersed in my own thoughts that I didn’t hear her coming until she was hugging me from behind and with her chin resting on my shoulders.

-Pancakes! – She excitedly said – it’s been awhile since I ate them!

I was getting nervous, having her so close and yet not being able to honestly express what I was feeling was surely a punishment. So I just smiled and continued with my task. Atsuko didn’t move from her place, not even when I finished with the pancakes and started cutting the fruits. If I moved, she moved with me and giggled. I was getting nervous again. When finally I finished, she separated from my body and after giving me another kiss she sat on the table; just like a kid waiting for her favorite meal.

I laughed at this and teased her. She looked away and pouted, I could notice that she was blushing too. Finally, placing the breakfast on the table, we ate in silence. There was no need for words at this point; both of us enjoyed those times when we stayed in silence, in company of the other. I could see her enjoying her meal and I couldn’t help to smile again. I missed her so much and even though work keeps me busy and prevented me to think about her, at every opportunity I had I always thought about her.

I loved her, there was no doubt about that; but I wasn’t ready.

-At what time is he gonna arrive again?

-Don’t do this again, Minami! – She yelled from the bathroom – He will come soon.

Tsk… She learns so fast.

We spent the whole afternoon cooking. She made a few mistakes that I had to fix, nothing too bad though and in the end everything tasted fairly good.

It was 7 pm already. I had work at 9, so I wanted to stay there until the very end. Of course, Atsuko would not allow it.

-You okay? – Miichan asked me.

The recording for that day was AKBSHOW and I was spacing out more than I should.

-Yeah, just thinking about…

-Acchan?

I wanted to deny it but then again I couldn’t. I simple keep quiet. Miichan giggled and gave me a few pats on my back.

-You really should get married soon.

-I know right?  … OI! Miichan!

She just laughed.

-It went that good, huh? – I said softly as Atsuko hugged me again.

-Thank you, Minami! For always being there to help me! – She said and kissed my cheek.

-Always… – I whispered.

She smiled and snuggled closer to me. She fell asleep quickly while I, on the other hand, sighed again.

What am I doing here again? I told to myself. We were in bed at Atsuko’s apartment, once again.

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16 Responses to “Acceptance 3.0”

  1. It’s here! Hahaha.

    I say, break them up. No offense to Onoe-san. xD

    This. AtsuMina is so cute and it feels like, Atsuko still can’t let go of Takamina. Though, I’m happy because they still have a chance of being together. *grins*

    I read this on that forum you mentioned but finished it here. xD

    Thank you for this, will wait for the upcoming chapters. :)

    By the way, your PS is killing me. I can’t wait for tomorrow. Hahahaha. :P

    • secnecrom Says:

      You perv! You only care about the smut one! XD

      I guess it was an stupid question though xD we all want Atsumina right?

      And since it’s here and it’s you, yes, of course, Atsuko still loves Minami. The thing is, since it was Minami who told her to experience love… Well she decided to go out with Onoe… But as you notice, Atsuko still calls her and gets easily jealous.

      Some comments on the forum, it gave me some ideas, and probably will just write one more chapter and then the end lol

      And yes! Wait for le smut!! XD you perv! :p

      • Whaaaattt? You can’t blame me. Hahahaha.

        Yeaaa, we all want Atsumina! :P

        Uh-huh. If this is Atsuko’s way of making Minami jealous and realize her true feelings then I kinda feel bad for Onoe-san. BUT! I can’t stand Minami getting hurt even more. So screw Onoe-san. xD

        Ohh. Hmmm. I wonder which one? I also read the comments and people are dying for your update. Hahaha. :P

        I will, fellow perv. Hahaha. :P

        Thank you for this. :D

      • I Knew it! You only care for the smut one! Dx

        I already posted it btw xD

        And yes! It’s gonna end soon! I will try to write it this week before the weekend cuz I will be busy -.- I’m gonna add some drama! Not much though xD

        Spoilers! Dx

        I hope you like the smut xD a rare pairing I guess! But anyway!

        Thank you for reading!! :D

      • It’s not just meeee. But nooo. I also for other stuff. Like drama and lovey-dovey stuff. And Atsumina and food. Hahaha.

        I didn’t comment right after I read this comment. I was looking for it. Mine also unfollowed your blog. ^_^;

        Ohhh. That’s great! Before I leave then. Hahaha. >:)

        It’s nottt! It’s predicting. Hahaha.

        I’m gonna go read it now. Thank you. :P

        You’re welcome! :)

      • secnecrom Says:

        Atsumina and food though xD

        It’s okay, I dunno why happens xD the unfollow ghost xD

        Wait for Acceptance 4.0 then! :D

      • Haha. Always care for those two things. :D

        Hmm. Maybe because of the update? It’s on my phone though.

        Yea. I will. And 5.0 and 6.0. Andddd, “Suddenly, Love” part 6? :P

        xD

      • secnecrom Says:

        Suddenly I feel like I have a lot to write and … /runs xD

      • Hahaha. Oh that’s ok. I can wait. :P

      • I hope I can write something this week, honestly!

        XD

      • Ohh. Goodluck then. :P

        I’m also writing one now but it’s kinda long, I don’t know when it’ll be finished. ^_^;

      • secnecrom Says:

        I wanna read now :O
        I’ll wait too :3

      • I wanted to post it too but I really don’t want to cut it into parts. ^_^;

        Thank you for your patience. :D

      • secnecrom Says:

        Yeah, sometimes I feel the same, that’s why it takes long time for me to post things over here xD

        And no prob, I understand the struggle :P

      • Hahaha. Thanks. I’ll do my best. I’ll post it ASAP. Thanks also for the patience. :D

  2. […] For those who haven’t read Acceptance here are chapter 1,2 and 3. […]

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